The most graceful girl in all the land

That last post was a grammatical disaster so take two:

 Since I just slipped on wet grass in front of 25 people, including a party I’m being left out of and a gauntlet of teenage boys who thoroughly intimidate me, I thought I’d detail my patented recovery technique: 

1)      FALL as gracefully as possible. A man once on the street said that I did and I was outrageously flattered. So, I try to keep up with that. I am a hot mess but I did do ballet for 10 years so I can surprise myself sometimes.

2)      Maintain as much dignity as possible by NEVER paying attention to how much dirt/mud/(blood?) I have on myself, and get up without my hands so I'm never groveling on the floor.

3)      Laugh a little too loud (although the “the too loud” part is never on purpose)

4)      Turn around, wave dramatically and shout, “I’M OK!!”

5)      Walk carefully but quickly back to safety and blush furiously in the privacy of my newfound anonymity.